I’d like to begin telling of someone I grew up with, someone who I have found to have taught me a lot. Unfortunately, like a few other people’s last interaction with me, the last time communicating with this man was right after a major incident in my life, where absolutely everything you can think of changed for me, and I was not in the best place.

That being said, out of respect, now I never existed nor will I ever show to exist.

Interestingly enough, this man’s good friend is one I currently need to forget about (and I mean literally erase all perceived notions about) because my brain functions backwards with some people. To add to this, both of these kid’s good friend (assuming they remain good friends – I’d think there are a lot of people who would think the same), was the last man I called a boyfriend and the first person I called a boyfriend. At one point, every time I thought of that kid, lust filled my body, and now, like a good girl, I see right through him, with no regrets, but what an educational time.

Back to the important one – one I haven’t thought about for a long while, although everytime I come down from 3rd ave to see my momma, I pass a house I knew was his and I imagine it stocked with the spirit of mother nature, almost as I would imagine Nanny McPhee’s house.

I pulled up my Instagram page today and his account was suggested. I allowed myself to stay on media for a bit today as I was in and out of sleep on my brothers couch laying with my momma and making fun of my brother. It was a great day.

Anyway (!), seeing his name flooded me with two memories that always make themselves known and aide my current situation. First, I was escorted to some event by this kid maybe when I was 12-13 and as we approached, I was told that I looked beautiful, first the first time ever by a boy. I am pretty sure this was during the time I first dated his mate, a quiet, way too sensitive kid. That was major for me and still is.

The other memory, if I am correct, was outside of what used to be CVS on the corner of Joralemon and Clinton, we were a little bit off the corner towards Remsen St. and I remember him telling me he was traveling for break. I think (!) I had said I was looking forward to seeing pictures and at his ye ol self, 13 years slim (possibly actually a bit older, but way ahead of his time), said I do not like to post pictures on SOCIAL MEDIA for what about those that do not get the opportunity, this can make someone feel (bad) – what follows are fill ins/opinions – those individuals are comparing themselves to the .1% of the population. This was a major realization. He was gentle and kind and I bet he still is. Anyway, I hope you’re still with me because now we get into my opinion and expression of social media due to the help of this kid.

I will make a new post for it.

Goodnight

<3